Day pass from the borg

Even though I was paid for all my paid time off in June this year, I've already earned several more days off since my re-assimilation in October.  So I decided to take off the remainder of this week and next Monday, so my colleagues with children would be freed up to take their days off between Christmas and New Year's.

Before I head to Austin Friday (more about that later), I have an appointment to see my therapist. The reason for this is that my ADD seems to be out of control too much of the time these days.

I thought re-employment would help. In the past, the martial arts lessons helped. But the ADD actually seems to be worse now that I'm working full time again. I'm at the point where I have difficulty reading a book, and when I go to bed, I have trouble turning my mind off. It just keeps racing along. Hence my occasional decision to get up, get dressed, and take my motorcycle out at 2-3:00 a.m. (Not recently, it's too frickin' cold.) And my blood pressure won't go down.

The Austin trip is not something I'm really looking forward to. I can't decide whether to put the kibosh on the whole Ryan thing - no visits, no nothing - or try to maintain a friendship. You see, I can't help but think he is still holding out some small hope that I will suddenly run into his arms one day.

This has taken me a while to accept simply as I don't think I'm a good candidate for 24/7 relationships.  Not this week, anyway. Ryan* could find someone younger, more attractive, and more moneyed. And besides, Ryan is horribly allergic to cats.

* See Key to Characters at right.